A friend of mine and I were having a conversation last week about "screen time". How it sucks time, and therefore life, away from you before you even realize it. I told her of another friend of mine who said that a study showed that people actually feel worse about themselves after they spend time on Facebook.
I believe it.
Facebook is bad for me.
Now, to start off with my disclaimer, there are many things I enjoy about Facebook. I enjoy being even minimally connected to people who I have shared life with along the way that I no longer live close to. And I'm pretty sure the business wouldn't have survived the first two years without it. Even now, it is my primary means of advertising, for free, thank you very much. I also think that the support gained through groups and prayers of hundreds is incredible.
But.....when I look at Facebook, my world becomes bigger and at the same time smaller in ways it doesn't necessarily need to be. I see people moving ahead with their businesses, adoptions and friendships. I see who they are with and where they are. Their kids and homes look perfect. They have hundreds of friends. Their
kids are in a million different activities and getting straight A's. I see like minded businesses with thousands of fans.
In the meantime, I feel lonely because I'm a natural introvert and while I like a lot of time to myself and having a few close friends, there is a lot of me that really wants to have a lot of friends and look like everyone else looks on Facebook. When I finish "catching up for the day", I feel like such a loser when I'm done exploring because that is where my heart has been for at least the last 20 minutes (at least), because who can get off the thing?
There used to be a phenomenon called the comparison trap when I was early in my mothering - 9 years ago now. It was dangerous, they said, to compare yourself to all the moms and families around you. How often does God tell us not to covet your neighbor - not to wish you had what they have? That was hard when I was surrounded by 10 moms. On Facebook, I'm surrounded by hundreds. Who can compete with that?!
Relationally, I'm a pretty quiet facebook person. I don't post a lot about myself or my family. I feel fake and weird about it a lot of times. I want people to know I'm real, but, I'm certainly not going to say - "Hey. I yelled at my kids today and got in a fight with my husband. Click "LIKE" if you did too.", although, I wonder what the response would be.
I think there should be another "book" called Realitybook. That's where people share who they really are and what is really happening - the good and the bad. Now that's something I could get on board with, perhaps. But, there's probably not much of a market for that.
What do you think? Can you relate?
